Ep. 85
Coaster
25 September 2024
Runtime: 00:49:54
An aging artist flew too close to the sun with a famous series of decorated beverage coasters in her youth. Now, years later, she finds herself at a bar without the means to pay. It's suggested that she decorate another coaster in lieu of payment. She reluctantly agrees, and the endeavor brings up difficult memories and feelings for the artist.
References
- Almost Plausible: Picnic Table
- Almost Plausible: Toilet Brush
- A Star Is Born
- Back to the Future
- Almost Plausible: Newspaper
- Midnight in Paris
- Serendipity
- Tiffany Darwish
- Debbie Gibson
- How I Met Your Mother
- Batman
- Quantum Leap
- Pablo Picasso
- Nicole Kidman
- Zac Efron
- The Paperboy
- The Butler
- A Family Affair
- Kevin Costner
- Susan Sarandon
- Bull Durham
- The Postman
- Tin Cup
- The Upside of Anger
- Parks and Recreation
- Nick Offerman
- Spokane, Washington
- Bechdel Test
- Steve Buschemi
- Bob’s Burgers
- Lagavulin: My Tales of Whisky
Corrections
During the conversation about Nicole Kidman and Zac Efron appearing in movies together, Shep’s Google search result told him that one of the films they appeared in was The Butler. A quick peek at the IMDb page for the film reveals this to be false, so what happened? Based on our research (and the research of a friend), we have determined that Google must have used AI to (incorrectly) generate a list of films the two actors have appeared in together. Lee Daniels directed both The Paperboy and The Butler, and in an article about the latter film, he was quoted talking about The Paperboy, where he mentioned Nicole Kidman and Zac Efron by name.
Transcript
[Intro music begins]
[Thomas]
Does he offer her a job? She has to work there. How does that come about?
[Shep]
He tells her if she wants to hang out, she has to work there.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
So she does.
[Emily]
And that’s where you have one of fun character actor, where she points out, “Well, Roger gets to sit here all day drinking. Why can’t I?”
[Thomas]
Or you just have it be Steve Buscemi and you don’t think anything like, oh, it’s just he’s gonna be some goofy character and be like, “Roger’s a goddamn hero. He was a firefighter in 9/11.”
[Emily]
Yep. 100%.
[Thomas]
And he just sort of raises his glass like, “It’s true.”
[Intro music]
[Thomas]
Hey there, story fans. Welcome to Almost Plausible, the podcast where we take ordinary objects and turn them into movies. I’m Thomas J. Brown, and joining me are Emily-
[Emily]
Hey, guys.
[Thomas]
And F. Paul Shepard.
[Shep]
Happy to be here.
[Thomas]
On today’s show, the three of us will create a movie plot based on Beverage Coasters. We’ll begin by sharing our pitch ideas. Then we’ll choose one and come up with our story. Before we do any of that, though, I have a question for the two of you. If you could design your dream beverage coaster, what features or designs would it have and what materials would it be made out of?
[Emily]
That is a very weird question I’ve never really contemplated before. I did at one point have a favorite set of coasters that I no longer possess. It was from Pottery Barn and it came in a little film canister. It looked like a little film canister.
[Thomas]
Yeah. Yeah.
[Emily]
And it was old vintage movie posters like Casablanca and North by Northwest and a couple other ones. Yeah, I really liked those.
[Thomas]
That’s cool.
[Emily]
And they were ceramic with the cork bottom.
[Shep]
My dream set of beverage coasters. You know how when you’re in a dream and you don’t like where things are going, you rewind a little bit and you go down a different path? That’s what I would do. I would like my beverage coasters to be made out of genie’s lamps, and I would wish to be in a different hypothetical.
[Thomas]
Yeah. I’ve never had super strong feelings about beverage coasters. I mean, they’re fine. I don’t know. I don’t have a lot of surfaces that necessitate coasters, so I don’t know. But I’ve had those ceramic ones with the cork bottom. They seem to work pretty well. I’ve had ones that are just cork. I’ve had ones that are fabric.
[Emily]
I found ones that were stone that sucked up the moisture.
[Thomas]
Yeah, yeah.
[Emily]
Those were okay, but heavy.
[Thomas]
Yeah. I like when they have a place to live when they’re not in use, so just kind of tidy in a way.
[Shep]
Sorry. Picturing like a little house with the beverage coasters.
[Thomas]
Knock on the door. “Hey, we need two of you to come out.”
[Shep]
Yep.
[Thomas]
“All right. Let us get our pants on.” All right. Well, I’m pitching first this week. I have-
[Shep]
Is it, is it about a little house with beverage coasters living in it?
[Thomas]
Well, I was gonna say I have two, but now maybe I have three. My first is a rom-com that starts with-
[Shep]
I’m on board.
[Thomas]
It starts with Marie and Doug at a bar with their respective friend groups. They meet for the first time when Marie picks up her drink to take a sip, and Doug takes her drink coaster, not realizing that it was being used. It’s classic enemies to lovers, and when they inevitably tie the knot, they have customized coasters made to hand out as wedding favors.
[Shep]
Plus, they were sitting at the same picnic table.
[Thomas]
My second idea is an action comedy film about a group of friends who sign up for a pub crawl competition to win a year’s supply of beer from a popular brewery. They must participate in a series of games and challenges at each bar, in addition to ordering a drink and collecting the special pub crawl challenge coaster as proof. There’s fierce competition from rival groups, but also within their own friend group. Love triangle, power struggle, whatever. At some point late in the evening, they realize the person in charge of all of their coasters has left them behind somewhere, and they have to scramble to find them.
[Emily]
He’s drunk at a Denny’s.
[Thomas]
Yep, there we go. And then in the background, there’s, the other group is there also like-
[Emily]
Yeah. Yep.
[Shep]
What? Oh, is this Toilet Brush?
[Emily]
Yes.
[Thomas]
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[Shep]
Okay.
[Thomas]
The Toilet Brush group is there also in the background.
[Shep]
Ah.
[Thomas]
We don’t call attention. They’re just there. If you know, you know. So perhaps someone saves the day by realizing that the rules say they have to order a drink at each bar, but it doesn’t actually require them to consume the beverage.
[Shep]
Spoilers.
[Thomas]
Well, you can rub one of your magic coasters and go back in time and not hear the spoiler then.
[Shep]
“Rub one of your magic coasters,” also sounds dirty.
[Thomas]
All right, Emily, let’s hear from you.
[Emily]
Alright, I have three. A mom invents a beverage coaster that will keep her cold drinks cold and her hot drinks hot. As she becomes more successful in business, she becomes more neglectful at home. Can she manage it all or does she need to give up one thing thing and give her all to the other?
[Shep]
Give up your family and be rich. What’s the choice?
[Emily]
Right. I mean, uh, next one is: a young man finds a coaster at a bar with a message from someone asking for help. He looks around but cannot see anyone who looks like they would need assistance. He ends up taking the coaster home with him. He can’t stop thinking about it and the person who may be in danger, he sets out to solve the mystery and is pulled into an obsession that takes over his life.
[Thomas]
And then later, somebody finds the coaster, and they’re like, “This guy needs help.”
[Emily]
Alright, my final one is a young girl realizes she can’t pay her bar tab while out on the town with friends. She sweet-talks the bartender into letting her pay with her art. She draws an intricate design on the back of a coaster and passes it to him. He lets her get away with it because he thinks she’s cute and caught a strong vibe between them as they flirted throughout the evening. The end of the night, as he’s counting out his tips to close her tab, he finds the coaster and is struck by the art she left. He finds her and tells her how amazing she is. And she’s surprised because she was just bullshitting him about being an artist and was hoping he thought she was cute enough to get away with it. They end up dating and he convinces her that she should pursue an art career. And we see her career and their relationship progress and we get hints of hardships in each.
[Shep]
And then a star was born.
[Emily]
Oh, damn. They were enemies and they became lovers.
[Shep]
Alright, I’m back on board.
[Emily]
That’s all for me.
[Thomas]
All right, Shep, let’s hear your pitches.
[Shep]
All right. A struggling writer attempts to bond with their estranged grandparent or parent. But it’s too late and their relative passes away. But they leave them their collection of vintage drink coasters from around the world in years gone by. Upon examining one of the coasters, the writer feels themselves drawn into it. And suddenly they’re at that bar all those years ago. And so is their relative now in their prime.
[Emily]
And they have sex and create their father-brother.
[Shep]
No, no, no. Why? Why? Did you just watch Back to the Future? No.
[Thomas]
This feels a little bit like Newspaper.
[Shep]
Yeah. I was thinking it’s like Midnight in Paris where you go back in time and you’re meeting other-
[Thomas]
Hmm.
[Shep]
I think he was a writer in that as well.
[Emily]
Yeah, he was.
[Thomas]
Think so? Yeah.
[Shep]
Yeah, but instead of going back and meeting famous authors, you go back and meet your relative that you never got to know back when they were your age. And all the hijinks they get up to and you don’t make out with them.
[Thomas]
Much.
[Shep]
Anyway, during a night on the town, our protagonist gets the number of a potential love interest who doesn’t have their phone with them for some reason, written on a drink coaster. They have a wonderful night, but the following day, they can’t find a drink coaster anywhere. So will they be able to reconnect? That’s it. It’s rom-com.
[Emily]
I’m interested in any of the ones where two people meet in the bar over a coaster.
[Shep]
I guess it’s kind of like Serendipity, if you guys remember Serendipity.
[Emily]
Oh, yeah.
[Shep]
And the second one, the rom-com, it’s a container. It’s a container that contains a phone number. It’s a MacGuffin.
[Thomas]
But it’s the MacGuffin that gets the story going.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
So.
[Shep]
Yeah.
[Emily]
Ooh. There’s a contest at the bar and you write your phone number on the coasters and put them in the thing. And it’s, like, a lotto, you know? Yeah, yeah.
[Thomas]
Like, a tombola.
[Emily]
And they pick it out, and so he’s trying to dig through it. Because somebody accidentally put hers in, thinking he was putting it in, and then he’s gotta dig through it and find it. How is he gonna know which one was hers? They all have the same name. Maybe he could remember her name. And they all have, like, they’re all Tiffany or Deborah or whatever. And so he gets like-
[Shep]
When is this movie set? So it’s Tiffany or Debbie Gibson? Is that what you’re saying? So it’s 1982. That explains why she doesn’t have a cell phone. It all makes sense now. It’s How I Met Your Mother.
[Emily]
Okay. But I do like the idea of, like, having him getting a bunch of coasters with the same name because he knows her name, but obviously he didn’t memorize the phone number, right?
[Thomas]
Right. So they, like, dump out the tombola. And he’s got, like, a couple of his friends, like, “Help me find the one with, you know, Tiffany’s name on it.” And they all, like, “Got it.” They all at the same time. Like, “I got it.” Like, “Oh, I got it.” “Damn it.”
[Shep]
“No, she draws a heart over her eye,” and they all go, “Yeah.”
[Thomas]
Yeah, he’s got to start calling all the different Tiffanys.
[Emily]
Yeah. You could end up meeting each of them. They’re like, “I don’t know. Maybe I did.”
[Shep]
Oh, well, if it’s gonna be that kind of movie, then he goes to meet each one, and then he has sparks with a different one, and then.
[Thomas]
Exactly. Yeah, that’s what I was just going to say. Yeah.
[Shep]
And then finally meets the one from that night, and she’s different the next day or later on, and the spark is not there. So which is he gonna choose? The one he originally had a spark with or the one he has a spark with now? Because this is what young people think love is like.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
Whoever you had the most recent spark with, that’s who you’re supposed to be with.
[Thomas]
So I think, Emily, my only problem, and maybe this is something we can workshop with the rom-com enemy-to-lovers idea, is he does just take her drink coaster. They’re not really enemies. It’s pretty low stakes.
[Shep]
Okay. The young girl who pays her bar tab with her art, I think, is setting unrealistic expectations. Unless she were already a famous artist, in which case, it would make total sense, like the Picasso example.
[Emily]
Right. That had been an original thought. But I thought it was kind of a cute twist to have her be like, “Oh, no, man. I was bullshitting you. I was just hoping you thought I was cute enough to not have to pay.”
[Thomas]
She’s an art forger, and…
[Shep]
But he is an undercover cop, so their love can never be. It’s Batman and Catwoman all over again. Now, I’m saying it could work, but if she were already an established artist.
[Emily]
Right. We could turn that one into a rom-com. it doesn’t have to be, you know, relationships are hard movie.
[Shep]
Yeah. Relationships are hard.
[Emily]
I know.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Emily]
I mean, it could still be a relationships are hard movie. I enjoy those, too. I like the collectible drink coasters, too. The passing away part, I mean, that’s a fun one.
[Shep]
“I like the passing away part.” Well, the reason I thought that one would be interesting, to go back and see your relative that you didn’t really know and see what they were like at different points in their life as you travel to the different bars at the different times and see them change over time.
[Thomas]
What’s the conflict in that story? I like that idea.
[Shep]
Why does it need to have a conflict?
[Thomas]
Because it’s a story.
[Emily]
Yeah. Is it man versus nature? Is it man versus man? Is it man…
[Shep]
It’s man versus coaster. Oh, but that’s just Quantum Leap. I was like, “Oh, he’s got to figure out a way to get back to his time.” Oh, no, that’s literally Quantum Leap.
[Emily]
You two are good at picking them. You pick one.
[Shep]
Any of them could work, because that’s the whole premise of the show.
[Emily]
Well, another idea I had about the artist one is that she does this, and they become a collector’s items. Like, she does it from bar to bar, like the Picasso thing.
[Shep]
Right, but she has to be an established artist.
[Thomas]
Well, I think that’s how she becomes an established artist. Like, the bartender knows that it’s not worth anything, but he takes it because he’s like, “Whatever, fine.” But he frames it and puts it up behind the bar because he’s like, “It’s kind of cute, whatever.” He likes her. But then that becomes a thing. People are asking about it. “What’s up with that coaster? That’s pretty cool.” He tells his bartender friends.
[Emily]
What becomes the conflict there? I think that’s why I had it where she was like, he pushes her to pursue it so that at some point they can have an argument where she’s like, “This wasn’t my dream. You had this dream for me, and I just went along with it” as women do. I mean, it’s not a good portrayal of a relationship, but they do happen.
[Shep]
All right, so the coasters live in a little house…
[Thomas]
All right, which of these stories has clear conflicts that we can build a story on?
[Shep]
What is it with you in conflict?
[Thomas]
I mean, pitch me a compelling story that doesn’t have conflict. Look, we’re burnt out. This was a hard one.
[Shep]
This was a hard one.
[Emily]
Hey, we each came up with more than one pitch for Drink Coaster, and that alone is an accomplishment.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
I think the problem that I have is the problem that I always have, where I want to take your ideas and go, “No, no, no, no. Here’s how your pitch actually should go.” And it’s like, that’s. That’s the hubris.
[Emily]
Well, no, it’s brain-. It’s workshopping. It’s brainstorming.
[Thomas]
Right. Yeah.
[Emily]
That’s how this works is we all come in and be like, “No, that’s not what I envision.”
[Shep]
Right. It’s the opposite of improv, where we don’t go, “Yes, and…”
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
We go, “No.”
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Emily]
“No.”
[Shep]
“That was dumb. But here’s how you can tweak it.” So, the one that I keep coming back to is the girl who can’t pay her tab and pays with art.
[Thomas]
Okay.
[Shep]
Except it’s completely backwards from Emily’s pitch, which is why I don’t want to say anything-
[Emily]
No. Say it.
[Shep]
Because it’s like, “Here’s Emily’s pitch, but no, no, no, no.” She’s a famous artist. She wants to pay her tab with her art. The bartender doesn’t know who she is-
[Emily]
Fair.
[Shep]
And doesn’t want to accept it because why would he? You know, “You can’t pay your tab with a scribble. Lady, what are you thinking?”
[Thomas]
Well, plus, like, if you look at all of the hand-drawn Picaso stuff now, it’s not worth very much because there’s so much of it.
[Shep]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
So it’s like, “You can’t pay your tab with art.” Like-
[Shep]
“You can’t always pay your tab with art.”
[Thomas]
Yes, yes, that’s it. Yeah.
[Shep]
So she’s going from bar to bar because the bars won’t let her do it twice because they’ll do it once and frame it and put it on the wall, but they won’t do it twice because two is not twice as valuable as one.
[Emily]
Right.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
So she hasn’t done it at this bar yet. She tries to do it. Bartender says, “No.” It’s got to be one of the other bartenders or a waitress or something, who’s like, “Oh, don’t you recognize her? She’s (so and so famous artist).”
[Thomas]
She has a shill who comes up. “Oh, my god, are you (so and so)?” And he’s like, “This is cute, you guys. Is what you’re doing here.”
[Emily]
“Adorable.”
[Shep]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
“Still no.”
[Shep]
So is she just a complete alcoholic? Why is she going to the bar with no money?
[Thomas]
Yeah, I was gonna say if she’s a famous artist…
[Shep]
I mean, famous artists are often very tortured and alcoholics. So, like, part of this checks out. But.
[Emily]
Well, she could also just be, you know, have lived the hype for too long. Maybe she was a child prodigy artist.
[Thomas]
Or she was, like, famous 20 years ago, and is kind of irrelevant now.
[Shep]
How old is she in this movie?
[Emily]
This is why she was a child prodigy artist. Unless we want to go older lady, younger bartender, rom-com, on board. Nicole Kidman and Zac Efron just did a movie together.
[Thomas]
That’s true.
[Emily]
It’s weird.
[Thomas]
It is. I agree.
[Shep]
So I tried to google this, and apparently there are three Nicole Kidman, Zac Efron movies?
[Thomas]
What?
[Shep]
The Paperboy in 2012, The Butler* in 2013, and A Family Affair in 2024.
(*See correction)
[Emily]
It’s A Family Affair.
[Thomas]
Well, now I have two more movies to put on my list. Well, it could be that, like, he’s the son who’s working in the bar and the dad owns the bar, and then the artist and the dad end up together.
[Shep]
Well, then why have him at all? Why not just have the dad as the-
[Emily]
It could just be an old-people rom-com. those are popular. Kevin Costner needs work. He’s got to pay for his movie somehow.
[Shep]
With his art? Is that what you’re saying?
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
He does seem like he would own a bar. Like, I could see him portraying a character that would be the type of guy that would own a bar.
[Emily]
Tag in Susan Sarandon as the artist.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Emily]
Bring that back together. Bull Durham it up.
[Shep]
I mean, you had me at Susan Sarandon.
[Emily]
She’s a phenomenal actress.
[Shep]
She really is!
[Emily]
She is, actually.
[Shep]
So old-people rom-com? Is that what we’re going with?
[Thomas]
Sure.
[Emily]
Yeah. Let’s do it. Kevin and Susan.
[Shep]
Kevin and Susan. We’ve already started casting before we have a plot. That seems very Hollywood.
[Emily]
Yeah. I’ve seen Kevin Costner movies. One out of every five is enjoyable.
[Shep]
See…
[Emily]
You think I’m joking.
[Shep]
I’ve seen worse odds than that.
[Thomas]
See, we gotta have some joke about him being, like, a retired postman or a retired golf instructor or whatever.
[Emily]
Right. He did already do the retired baseball player in a movie called The Upside of Anger, which is one of his one out of five that is good.
[Thomas]
Is this in the city or is this, like, a smaller town? And that’s why he doesn’t know her. Because I feel like, could she really get away with that at every bar in a city? They’d all start talking to each other and be like, “Hey, watch out for this lady. She comes in, doesn’t pay her tab.”
[Emily]
Is she past her prime at this point? Like, it worked when she was in her prime. Her avant-garde, you know?
[Thomas]
Maybe this isn’t a thing that she does. Maybe she was, like, a really popular artist and she did this really famous series and she hasn’t done anything since because she’s been really nervous about, “How am I going to outdo what I’ve done previously?” She doesn’t have that inspiration anymore. And she’s like, for some reason, she is in this town overnight, unplanned, and she’s in this bar, and she realizes, “I don’t have my wallet, but I am this artist. I will sketch you something. It’s the first piece I’ve done in 20 years. You could sell it for probably half a million dollars.” And he’s like, “You think I haven’t heard this before?” And she’s like, “What? Is this common?”
[Shep]
Okay. I… Fuck! “No, no, no, no. I want to do the opposite of what you said.”
[Thomas]
You just gotta frame your “nos” differently. You say, “That’s a great idea, Thomas. And it has inspired me to come up with a slightly different version.”
[Shep]
That’s. I mean, you did inspire me to say the opposite of that. So-
[Emily]
Well, that’s a wonderful idea. But this…
[Shep]
What I was thinking was, she doesn’t do this anymore. She just wants to pay her tab, and it’s someone else in the bar who is a fan of her work. Okay, so she did this series of drink coasters, you know, ten years ago. And so these 22 bars are super famous, and they’re like a tourist attraction. Like, people make the circuit of the 22 bars.
[Thomas]
Right, because those are the bars she used to drink at when she was hot shit in the art world.
[Shep]
Right. And she did a coaster at each. And so each one on the wall has one of her coasters, and it’s a series of images.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
And so she just wants to pay her tab and go home. But someone at the bar was trying to convince her, “No, no, just do the coaster. Do a coaster because you haven’t done one a long time.” And then this bar would be part of that set. This would be the 23rd. There hasn’t been a new one in years. This would be in the newspaper. Like, people would talk about this and drive traffic to this bar. Maybe the bar is struggling because you know how hard it is to make money with a bar. But she doesn’t want to do this because she doesn’t have that inspiration anymore. And so she just wants to pay her tab, but she’s lost her wallet, and so they’re like, “We’ll pay the tab, but you, you do the art.” But she can’t. She doesn’t have the inspiration. So they send her home with the coaster. Like, just take it until you have the inspiration and then bring it back. And so that’s the struggle for her, is, “Do I still have it in me, or is it gone? Did I use up all of that inspiration, all of that magic, and now I’m just a woman without any special gift.”
[Emily]
Oh, I actually like this because it could be the Kevin Costner character who’s like, “No, no, do this.” And then she comes back the next day because she doesn’t want to. And she’s like, “Here, just, I’m going to pay my tab.”
[Thomas]
Right. She brings her wallet.
[Shep]
Right.
[Emily]
And he’s just like, “No, no, you’ve got to do this.” And he’s just kind of, like, bullying her into it almost.
[Shep]
Uh, no. (pained noises)
[Emily]
No.
[Shep]
Let’s not have the man bullying the woman right away. Uh, that’s. I’m doing it again. I’m just going, “No, no, no, no.”
[Emily]
No.
[Shep]
Do I have any other fucking mode than this? God damn.
[Thomas]
I agree, though.
[Emily]
Clearly the eighties and nineties broke my brain, and I don’t know how men and women are supposed to interact.
[Shep]
Okay. He wants her to do it. Not because, you know, she’s a famous artist or whatever. It wasn’t even his idea.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
But she made a deal, and he wants her to honor it. So it’s more about honoring the deal than anything else for him. Like, he doesn’t really care about the art or getting a famous piece on his wall.
[Emily]
He’s just a gruff man of honor.
[Shep]
He’s a gruff man. He’s Ron Swanson who owns a bar. Can we get Nick Offerman for this? Or is he too young? He might be too young.
[Thomas]
It doesn’t have to be a rom-com.
[Shep]
No, you’re right. It doesn’t have to be a rom-com. it could just be her refinding her spark.
[Emily]
No. Yep.
[Shep]
See, I kind of want it to be a rom-com, though, because, you know, them spending time together as she struggles to come up with something.
[Thomas]
Well, and that’s been… That was how she got inspiration at those other bars. Well, she spent time at those bars. This is the first time she’s ever been in this place before. So she has no connection to it. She doesn’t feel-
[Emily]
She has no history with it.
[Thomas]
Right. She doesn’t feel the spark. So does he offer to let her drink there for free?
[Shep]
No. What? He’s a businessman. Have some sense, Thomas.
[Emily]
She has to become a waitress or a bartender herself.
[Shep]
I’m gonna do the opposite of “No, no, no”. And Emily. Yes, yes, yes. She wants to spend time there. She can work. She can be a waitress. So all the other waitresses are, like, in their early twenties. And then there’s Susan Sarandon. I love it. Because she’s lacking confidence.
[Emily]
And she’s done art for the last 35 years. She doesn’t really know how to be a waitress, but she’s drank a lot, so she kind of knows.
[Shep]
She knows all the drinks.
[Thomas]
Right. Yeah.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
Oh, maybe she ends up being really good because she’s like, “Oh, you shouldn’t drink that with that.”
[Emily]
Yeah, yeah. I was thinking that she does that. Or like, she comes across a, like, shitty date, and she’s like, “Oh, honey, you need to just go. Just leave.” Like, she says this in front of the man, too.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Emily]
And people start coming more. Because she’s fun.
[Thomas]
Well, and she’s recognized, so there’s that as well.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
Is this performance art? Like, what’s happening?
[Shep]
Right. I like the idea that you said where she tells the girl to leave in front of the guy. And maybe that starts, like, he wants to be physically, he wants to start a conflict. And this is where the bartender comes in.
[Thomas]
Oh, yeah.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
That’s good. How does she react to him, basically strong-arming the dude out of the bar?
[Emily]
Is she appalled because she’s a feminist?
[Thomas]
Right. Is she like, “Hey, I could have handled that,” or is she. She like, “Oh, okay, well, thank you. Appreciate that. Thanks for looking out for me.”
[Shep]
We could go either way.
[Emily]
Yeah. I was going to say, tradition dictates that she would be like, “I could have taken care of it. He was just a small man with a small penis trying to act big.”
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Emily]
And he could be like, “You don’t know these guys out here. They’re wild cards, blah, blah, blah.” You know, that kind of conversation. They’re not in the city. Right? They’re, like, in a small community?
[Shep]
If they were in a small community, everyone would already know her.
[Thomas]
No, she’s passing through.
[Emily]
Okay. Not a small town, but not a big city. She’s in Spokane-esque size.
[Shep]
she’s in Spokane, not New York.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
So the 22 bars that already have coasters, you can do a pub crawl.
[Emily]
Mmm.
[Thomas]
People do pub crawls because you can walk to all of them.
[Emily]
Right.
[Thomas]
But this one is not near those.
[Shep]
Ah, well, then they would be less motivated, because it can’t be on the same circuit. It’s for the reasons that you said. It’s too far away.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
That loses a lot of the reason for them to have her do it.
[Emily]
So you want her to stay? Have it stay in a big city?
[Shep]
I mean, does Spokane have 22 bars?
[Thomas]
Yeah. That you can walk to between them? We could lower the number.
[Shep]
We could lower the number. Why don’t we lower the number?
[Thomas]
Or we could enlarge the city. Either way.
[Shep]
Let’s lower the number. There were nine bars, and this would be the 10th.
[Thomas]
Ah, yeah.
[Shep]
That makes it a nice, even number as well.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
And it’s also been ten years since she started this. This is the 10th anniversary.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
It’s the 10th bar. Like, the heavens are aligning for this thing.
[Thomas]
Yes.
[Shep]
If only she could be inspired. But because the hype is so big, the pressure is too high.
[Emily]
Right. Because what if she doesn’t have it anymore? What if it doesn’t fit with the rest? What if-
[Shep]
Well, it kind of doesn’t matter how good it is, because the expectations are so sky high, because the previous nine show this, like, evolution of art over time. The first one is kind of panicked and really quick. It’s a quick sketch. It’s like the Picasso ones, where it’s just a couple simple line drawings. Like, it’s nothing fancy, because that one was spur of the moment. That was like, “I lost my wallet. I don’t have the money, but I am a famous artist. So here’s this thing.” And then the rest get more complex and more elaborate. And she’s more confident in her art as it goes on. And that’s the problem. She was growing in confidence, and now there’s been this gap of years.
[Thomas]
So in the end, does she create a coaster? A 10th coaster?
[Emily]
I vote yes. But I had a question about the type of art she was doing on the other nine coasters. Is it abstract?
[Shep]
(gasp) I’m sorry.
[Emily]
No, that’s g-
[Shep]
Continue. I have a thought.
[Emily]
Okay.
[Shep]
I’ll wait till you say what you’re going to say, and then I can say, “No, no, no.”
[Emily]
And then saying, “No, no, no, no.” Yeah.
[Shep]
I’m so predictable.
[Emily]
My thought was, she was more of an abstract artist to begin with, so they’re all sort of abstract, but intricate and think-piecey.
[Thomas]
Sure.
[Emily]
And then this one, the final coaster that she does end up making is a very realistic rendering of the outside of the bar.
[Shep]
Ah, okay. No, no, no, no. This might be too cliche, but if it’s a Hollywood movie, then-
[Thomas]
They’ll love it.
[Shep]
You can see where it’s going. The bartender has a daughter. She never had kids. Can you see where this is going? What’s the art gonna be on the coaster? It’s the three of them as a family.
[Thomas]
Hmm.
[Emily]
Ah, the family. Also heartwarming.
[Shep]
Also heartwarming. But I like the idea that her art is abstract, and especially if it’s getting more abstract as the series progresses. Like, the first one is an elephant or whatever. Or if that’s. I think that’s what Picasso did. Something like that. Where it’s a simple thing.
[Thomas]
Oh, I could totally see her doing that. She would know that-
[Shep]
Yes.
[Thomas]
As an artist who has studied, she’d be like, “Oh, this will be kind of a funny little thing.”
[Shep]
Right.
[Emily]
A little nod. Yeah.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
Yeah.
[Emily]
And they get more intricate and abstract as she goes.
[Shep]
They get more abstract. One of them is just like a line, but it’s like the essence of a swan or whatever. Then they get very complex. Ones, you know, pointillism. And I think at one point, she goes into a bar and gets a coaster right away and spends the whole night on one coaster.
[Thomas]
Right. Yeah. People are watching.
[Shep]
For the series. For the series.
[Thomas]
Yes.
[Shep]
Because it’s famous at that point.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
Yes.
[Emily]
It’s like coaster number 8.
[Shep]
Right. So, like, there’s a crowd of people around.
[Thomas]
Right. She’s like, brought a whole paints kit with her and sets up at a table in a corner, and people are cheering and…
[Shep]
The press is there and they’re taking photos and-
[Thomas]
There’s a line out the door.
[Shep]
Right, and then the 9th one is disappointing. Whatever it is was a letdown. Yeah.
[Thomas]
Hmm.
[Emily]
It’s not as cool.
[Shep]
Because how could it be?
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Shep]
How could it be? She spent 8 hours on this one. And so everyone criticized her for losing it, losing her gift. She doesn’t have it anymore.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
Look at this derivative piece of shit. So there were all these articles and whatever covering her downfall on the 9th coaster kind of ruining the series.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
It didn’t even come to a satisfying ending.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
If she had just stopped at eight, it would have been fine. She ruined it with the 9th one. And it’s permanently damaged.
[Emily]
And that’s why her anxiety is much higher now.
[Shep]
Yes.
[Thomas]
Yeah, that makes sense.
[Shep]
And it’s like some of the pub crawls don’t even go to the 9th one because it’s so bad.
[Thomas]
All right.
[Shep]
They stop at eight where it should have stopped. You can even have, like, art fans talk about the proper viewing order of the coasters. And it’s 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 stop. Skip the first one and the last one. So she doesn’t want to do it anymore. Like, the joke is over for her. Like, it’s not fun, but she gets talked into it.
[Thomas]
At some point, does she dash off a quick sketch, and he doesn’t accept that?
[Shep]
Oh, I’m sure.
[Emily]
Oh, and he’s like, “This is garbage. No.”
[Shep]
Oh, so maybe it’s his daughter that’s the art fan that has talked him to accepting this coaster.
[Thomas]
Hmm.
[Shep]
And so she dashes one off real quick, like you said, and just picture the disappointment in her face when she sees it.
[Emily]
Yeah. She’s like, “Oh,” but she doesn’t want to be rude.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
Right.
[Emily]
So she does the fake “Oh, yeah.”
[Shep]
Right.
[Shep]
And it’s Kevin Costner who’s like, “Are you sure that this is what you want to submit? This is your art? This is your 10th?”
[Thomas]
I remember when I was a kid, I did a slapdash job of washing my dad’s car, and he asked, “Is this the kind of job that you would sign your name to?” And I’ve always remembered that as like, ooh, like, okay. So it could be something like that where he’s like, “Is this- Are you sure you want people to see this and know that it’s yours?”
[Shep]
Right. Like he’s willing to accept it. Like, “If you’re sure.”
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Emily]
Yeah, get her out of the bar. Whatever.
[Shep]
Right.
[Emily]
He is no horse in this race.
[Shep]
Right.
[Thomas]
Well, he didn’t specify any constraints or requirements.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
Just said, “Art on a coaster. Just decorate a coaster for me.” That was all he asked for.
[Shep]
Yep.
[Thomas]
And so, yeah, he puts it on her. “Are you sure? Are you happy with this? Is this what you want?” She’s like, “No, no, no.” She takes the coaster back. All right, we have a pretty good foundation for our story, so let’s take a break here, and when we come back, we’ll figure out the rest of our story for a coaster.
[Break]
[Thomas]
We are back from our break.
[Shep]
How old is the daughter?
[Thomas]
Is she studying art in college?
[Shep]
Could be.
[Emily]
She could be anywhere from 20 to 30.
[Shep]
Well, how old is he? If she’s 30?
[Emily]
If it’s Kevin Costner, he’s almost 70.
[Shep]
Oh, God damn. Okay, maybe it’s not Kevin Costner.
[Thomas]
So it’s Nick Offerman. Got it.
[Shep]
Yeah. Well, I was bringing that up because I wanted to know how much interaction does she have with the daughter? Maybe the daughter wants to follow in her footsteps. She’s a big fan of her art. She’s a big inspiration to the daughter.
[Emily]
Can that be the second act turning point where he has a conversation with her about how her daughter- His daughter is, you know, looks up, you know, she’s gonna give up or whatever, and he has that conversation about, you know, “You’ve inspired my daughter…”
[Shep]
Do we want him for that conversation, or do you want that to be her and the daughter?
[Emily]
Od do you want the daughter to do that?
[Shep]
Yeah.
[Emily]
Could be that either way.
[Shep]
Because he’s easygoing.
[Emily]
Yeah. It would be better if it was the daughter because they don’t need a man to move the plot along.
[Shep]
Oh, we passed the Bechdel test. It’s the two of them talking about her art.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Shep]
We did it!
[Thomas]
Is that the turning point, though? Because I feel like, well, I guess, what is her goal throughout the film? At the beginning, she just wants to pay for her drinks, and then he sort of insists that no, she actually do this thing. So she says, “Well, I have to- If I’m going to do this, I have to have a connection. I have to spend time here.” Does he offer her a job? She has to work there. How does that come about?
[Shep]
He tells her if she wants to hang out, she has to work there.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
So she does.
[Emily]
And that’s where you have one of fun character actor, where she points out, “Well, Roger gets to sit here all day drinking. Why can’t I?”
[Thomas]
Or you just have it be Steve Buscemi and you don’t think anything like, oh, it’s just he’s gonna be some goofy character and be like, “Roger’s a goddamn hero. He was a firefighter in 9/11.”
[Emily]
Yep. 100%.
[Thomas]
And he just sort of raises his glass like, “It’s true.”
[Shep]
We’re calling him Roger, not Steve?
[Thomas]
Whatever.
[Shep]
Because Steve would be a bad guy.
[Emily]
Well, he’s not a bad guy.
[Shep]
Right.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[Emily]
He’s Roger.
[Thomas]
So I guess at that point in time, because it feels like at that point, she’s already like, “Okay, I’m gonna take this seriously.” I feel like if she’s gonna have a conversation with the daughter, that’s what makes her want to take it seriously is that conversation. Maybe during that first act when she’s working at the bar, she’s like, “Fine, whatever.” Like, “I’ll figure something out. I’ll make something.” But she’s not really into it.
[Emily]
Yeah. She’ll make something better than she had that first attempt.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Emily]
But she’s still not gonna give it her all.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Emily]
So do we see the daughter working on an art piece or studying or something?
[Thomas]
Ooh, that could be really good. The daughter has some piece that she’s working on. There’s, like, the residence that’s the back half of the bar.
[Shep]
Right.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
She goes back there for something, and she sees the daughter’s piece, and she’s looking at it. And then the daughter comes in to get something or whatever, and then they have a conversation about it.
[Shep]
Right. She can give her advice as an experienced artist. Like, the daughters, not confident in it.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
And she’s like, “Oh, but here’s what’s really good.”
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
Like, “I understand why you’re not confident. No one can draw hands. Like, that’s fine.”
[Thomas]
Right. Yeah. And then the dad comes in, Kevin comes in. He’s like, “Ladies, I need you out here. It’s getting busy.” Is he supportive of his daughter’s choice to become an artist?
[Shep]
He doesn’t get it. But he is supportive as a parent.
[Thomas]
Okay.
[Emily]
He doesn’t get it, but it makes her happy, and she is passionate about it, and he’d rather have her have passion for her work than be concerned with making money or whatever.
[Shep]
Right. Because he’s a retired golfer, so he’s got that money.
[Emily]
Well it’s Nick Offerman. So he’s a retired sax player.
[Shep]
That’s a type of art, though, so.
[Emily]
Yeah. So he would get it.
[Shep]
Right.
[Emily]
Well, he didn’t follow his dreams. He just inherited his dad’s bar. He’s Bob from Bob’s Burgers. It’s just what he knew how to do.
[Shep]
It was supposed to be an investment opportunity. They were going to build up this bar and flip it, then move on to something else. But I just never made enough money.
[Thomas]
I mean, he could have also been a mechanic and had a very successful shop and sold it for a whole bunch of money. And this is what he does to pass time. He just hangs out with Roger and the friends in the neighborhood. They don’t need the bar to make money. It’s fine.
[Emily]
The bar needs to make enough money to stay open.
[Thomas]
Right. I mean, that’s the thing. It covers its rent, whatever.
[Emily]
Yeah. Yeah.
[Thomas]
As long as that happens, he’s good. So that’s why he doesn’t really care if he loses out on her $20 tab. It’s not going to hurt him.
[Shep]
Right.
[Thomas]
He’s fine.
[Shep]
And she never makes a coaster. That’s also fine.
[Thomas]
Right. He’s not counting on that-
[Shep]
That sweet, sweet coaster money.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
This was his dad’s favorite bar. This was the bar that his dad went to. So his dad had all these stories about going to this bar and all his friends being there.
[Thomas]
Yeah, maybe there’s a… Let’s say his dad’s name is Bob. There’s Bob’s booth. Right? And it’s got, like, family photos in there. It’s, like, in the corner, it’s lit nicely, and it’s got a little plaque.
[Shep]
Oh, this is where the drink coaster goes at the end.
[Thomas]
Oh, yeah, totally.
[Emily]
Yeah, totally. 100%. Where’s the girl’s mother? Do we care? Is it just one of those things we just gloss over? Because sometimes you don’t need to know.
[Shep]
She’s not dead. She left him.
[Emily]
She’s just gone, okay?
[Shep]
She’s just gone. She divorced him. She thought that he was boring.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
Right.
[Thomas]
He was just a boring old mechanic, and then he sold his business for two and a half million dollars. and… (flustered sounds). After the divorce, though, she missed out.
[Shep]
So she, she met some guy who followed his passion, so she hooked up with that guy.
[Thomas]
Some golf instructor or something.
[Shep]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
He’s a little older, but.
[Shep]
Yep.
[Thomas]
See, we got Kevin back. What’s the lowest low here? We’ve talked about her big struggle is lacking confidence. So is there a big final moment where she really has no faith in herself?
[Emily]
Does a reporter get wind of this somehow?
[Thomas]
Ooh. Right. The pressure’s built.
[Emily]
So now the pressure’s built up even more, and he mentions, you know, a lot of people didn’t like the 9th one, and it just brings that up and digs that deep wound deeper.
[Thomas]
Right. The press is dredging all that stuff up again.
[Emily]
Yeah. So she’s gonna just pack up. She doesn’t need this. She leaves the $20 on the bar.
[Thomas]
Right. She does leave. Oh, she still has the shitty sketch she made at the beginning, and she gives it to him and she leaves.
[Shep]
Oh, and then he doesn’t put it up because it would ruin her reputation.
[Thomas]
Oh, yeah. So then why does she come back?
[Emily]
Something with the daughter.
[Shep]
Gotta be the daughter.
[Thomas]
Yeah. It’s got to be the daughter.
[Emily]
Does the daughter win some prestigious award in college or-?
[Shep]
No, no, no. It- (angry realization) Why, why?
[Emily]
No! That was a yes or no question, so it’s fine that the answer was no.
[Shep]
I didn’t even just say no, though. I’m like, “No, no, no, no!”
[Thomas]
“Emily. You couldn’t be more wrong, you stupid bitch.”
[Emily]
“You dumb whore. Why do we let you on the show?”
[Shep]
Why do you let me on this show? Okay, it’s not that the daughter won some award, but she’s having, her class is having an art show.
[Thomas]
Yeah. Yeah.
[Emily]
Their show.
[Thomas]
That’s what I was going to say.
[Emily]
They’re opening.
[Shep]
And she invited Susan Sarandon’s character to come and see the art. And she previously had agreed to do it.
[Thomas]
Yep.
[Shep]
And that’s before that, she’s like, “Oh, I’m out. There’s too much pressure and I don’t even want this anyway.” So does she go to the art show? That’s the question. Does she go to the art show or does she bail and the daughter calls her afterward?
[Thomas]
Yes. She goes to the art show. And, so this is the beginning of the third act. So she is now surrounded by people who look up to her, and so she gets all of this really positive energy. People who talk about her. In fact, maybe a couple other people there are inspired by her, and they’re excited to show her their work. “This is something that I did because of you.” “I’ve based this off of work of yours that I saw.” “You’ve been such an inspiration.”
[Emily]
Right, but they bring up other work. Work outside of the coasters.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
Not the coasters, the other stuff that she cared more about. Maybe even some really obscure stuff that was back when she was in school that people haven’t seen in 40, 50 years, whatever it is. And she’s like, “How did you find this?” Like, “Oh, it was a retrospective” or whatever, you know? All right, Shep, go ahead and say no to that, and then we’ll hear what your idea is.
[Shep]
No, that was good.
[Thomas]
But. So, yeah, that gives her a little boost of confidence. And then she comes back to the bar, and she demands her coaster back.
[Emily]
But does Nick Offerman’s character say, “No, we’re done? You left.”
[Thomas]
Oh, no, I think he knew.
[Emily]
Like, yeah, he knew, but I want him to- Does he egg her on more? Can he be hurt about thinking she was gonna ditch his daughter and the disappointment wasn’t just her? “I liked having you around.”
[Thomas]
Oh, right. He would be there, too, at the thing.
[Emily]
Yeah, that’s true.
[Shep]
Ah, of course he would. To support his daughter, who he doesn’t understand, but he loves.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
Yeah. Right, right.
[Emily]
Yes.
[Shep]
Ooh, I wanna inject a scene so bad.
[Emily]
Do it.
[Thomas]
Okay, let’s hear it.
[Shep]
Sometime prior to this, Nick Offerman and Susan Sarandon get into a conversation about art, about her art, about some specific painting that his daughter really liked, and he didn’t understand it. And she explains it to him like, “This is why I did it like this. This is what I was thinking at the time.” And she’s like, just walking him through her experience. And you can see there’s, like, this moment where her passion is there again as she remembers all this thing that she went through. But forget about that. Later at the art showing, that painting comes up again. She’s not there. Nick Offerman is there, and the teacher is there, and the teacher is explaining the art, and he’s doing it wrong. And Nick often goes, “Actually.” Because he, you know, he’s an honest guy.
[Thomas]
Right.
[Shep]
And he’s just gonna explain as it was explained to him, this is what she was feeling.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
And the teacher’s like, “You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, you fool.”
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
“This is how art-” And then she shows up, and it’s a big face-slapping moment where she’s like, “No, you’re wrong. He is right. And I should know. That’s me.” That’s it. That’s the scene that I wanted to inject.
[Thomas]
If we’re making this, are we still making this a rom-com?
[Shep]
I… It’s… um…
[Thomas]
Or a romance? Whatever.
[Emily]
Romance.
[Thomas]
Because what I was thinking is, I like that scene, but-
[Shep]
I’m sorry. You have to say, “No, no, no, no, no.” And then put your correction in. That’s-
[Thomas]
But it’s not- I just want to add to it.
[Shep]
Okay.
[Thomas]
It’s a yes, and. It’s a yes, and…
[Shep]
Oh. Oh, no. Oh, no. We’re doing improv.
[Thomas]
Yes, and Susan Sarandon is standing at the back. She has come into the room while the conversation is happening. So she has heard Nick Offerman correctly explain the art. And so that’s a touching moment for her. Like, “Oh, he wasn’t just humoring me. He was actually listening.”
[Shep]
Yeah. And how nice is that?
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Shep]
And so you see that kind of glimmer there of, like, he pays attention, he listens when she’s talking. This is every woman’s fantasy.
[Emily]
Mhmm.
[Thomas]
So, during the third act, the press all dies down about the 10th coaster, taking off that pressure.
[Shep]
Right. And it’s like, is it even more disappointing that there’s no coaster at all? Is this worse than the 9th coaster? I’m sorry. Continue. I’m just thinking how articles would spin it.
[Thomas]
Right. No, I was just thinking through, like, what happens next? So do they put up the 10th coaster with zero fanfare?
[Emily]
Yes.
[Thomas]
They don’t even tell anyone. They just stick it up in Bob’s corner.
[Emily]
I like that. Nice, subtle happy ending.
[Shep]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
So I have in my mind a scene where Susan and the daughter are painting together. You can’t see what they’re painting. They just have their easels set up next to each other. We’re looking at them. So we see the backs of- We’re looking at their faces. We see the backs of the easels. They’re having a conversation. They’re laughing. Whatever. They’re painting. Nick Offerman is there reading, whatever, you know. Having a scotch, probably. And… A Lagavulin, specifically. And what we find out later is what she was painting was their family portrait on the coaster that gets pinned up in Bob’s corner. Slow push up to the coaster, fade to black, roll credits. Right?
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Shep]
So this is sometime later.
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Shep]
This is after they are established as a…
[Emily]
Yeah.
[Thomas]
The denouement is that the coaster gets finished. So the climax is the family unit coming together?
[Emily]
Yeah. It has to be, if that’s gonna be the denouement. One of them has to be kind of a jerk. They have to have that misunderstanding to where they can’t be together. It’s romance 101.
[Thomas]
But that’s the lowest low, is she leaves.
[Emily]
She left. Okay.
[Thomas]
So that’s the quote, unquote “misunderstanding”. That’s the low point in their relationship, is she doesn’t give him the thing that she said she would. Kind of, but it’s the shitty one.
[Emily]
Right. And they had already kind of established their relationship was blossoming at that point.
[Thomas]
Yes. Yes.
[Shep]
Why does she leave? Oh, she’s having a bad time with the press.
[Emily]
Yeah, the press keeps bringing it up. She’s feeling like a failure again.
[Shep]
Right, right.
[Emily]
This isn’t her world. This isn’t her life.
[Emily]
She’s not really a waitress.
[Thomas]
She could have slept with him. And then the daughter is like, “You’re not my mom. Grr.” I don’t know.
[Emily]
The daughter calls her on her bullshit and says, “You’re just scared. You just. You’re too scared to admit that you’re scared, and you’ll never be what you were until you can get over that” or whatever.
[Thomas]
Well, she could even just be repeating back basically stuff that Susan has told her.
[Emily]
Right.
[Thomas]
It’s like, “This is all you need to do.” And she’s like, “Well, I can’t do that.” It’s like, “Listen to your own advice.”
[Emily]
So how do they repair it? Besides her showing up at the art thing and seeing that he’s listened and learned from her. And the daughter piece is well received.
[Shep]
Okay. Due to the pressure of the reporters and all the history coming back up again that she thought she was over, but she’s not because she never did go to therapy, and she didn’t process her grief over losing, basically her career. She snaps and she yells at Nick Offerman’s character like he is trying to give her time, and she’s like, “No, I’m done. I did my time, and it didn’t work out. So I’m leaving. I have no connection to this bar, and I don’t want to make a connection to this bar. I don’t know this place. I’m leaving, and I’m never going to come back here again. This part of my life is over.” Oh, maybe he asks her out to something, like he’s planning maybe a relationship with her, and she’s like, “Cancel those plans. That’s not going to happen. I’m never coming back here again.” She leaves. She’s not seen again until the art show. And she talks to him after and is like, “You listened?” And he’s like, “Yeah.” And she’s like, “Well, do you want to go somewhere?” And he’s like, “Do you want to go get a drink?” Like, back to his bar. And so she does go back. That’s her saying that she did overreact that one time, but he’s very forgiving.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
And accepting of her stresses.
[Emily]
Well, I mean, his daughter’s an artist. He knows. He knows.
[Shep]
Yeah, he knows how it is. Yeah.
[Emily]
When she says, “You actually listen,” he’s like, “Yeah, I’m a bartender. I’m a good listener.”
[Shep]
Yep. I like that he listens because he’s a bartender. He understands the flights of fancy, of artists because his daughter is an artist. Like, he’s really kind of the perfect match for her.
[Emily]
Right. He’s a nice anchor for her.
[Shep]
Right. He can be supportive even when he doesn’t understand, because he doesn’t need to understand to be supportive.
[Thomas]
And then is there, like, a post-credits scene where he’s lounging nude on a chaise, posing for her? He’s got, like, a bear skin over his bits.
[Shep]
I was thinking that they would have been teaching him how to paint, and he does, like, a single brush stroke, and they’re like, “God damn, that’s good.”
[Thomas]
Do they do, like, you know, drinking and painting classes in the bar?
[Shep]
Ooh.
[Emily]
Oh, I like that.
[Shep]
I like that.
[Thomas]
Is there anything else that we need to work out for this story before we wrap it up?
[Emily]
I feel fairly satisfied with it.
[Shep]
As always, we can always add more.
[Emily]
Right.
[Thomas]
Yeah.
[Shep]
But we’re out of time.
[Thomas]
Well, we’d love to hear your thoughts on today’s episode about a Coaster. Was it full of ups and downs? Nothing? No reaction to that?
[Emily]
No.
[Shep]
I don’t get it.
[Thomas]
A coaster, ups and downs.
[Emily]
Oh, that’s a roller coaster pun. We’re talking about a drink coaster.
[Thomas]
Ah. However, you have to pick your drink up and put it back down on the coaster so it works both ways.
[Emily]
I like that he set up that pun for one of us to say that.
[Thomas]
Or are we all wet? Let us know by leaving a comment on our website, reaching out on social media, or sending us an email. Links to all of those can be found at AlmostPlausible.com. And hey, listener, before you go, you and I both know that Almost Plausible is your favorite podcast, but if you can believe it, there are still a ton of people out there who haven’t even heard of the show. I know that’s wild, but it’s true. Can you do me a favor? Can you tell someone about the show? I mean, we both know that you’ll really be doing them a favor. And if you do that, there’ll be even more friends to join Emily, Shep, and I on the next episode of Almost Plausible.
[Outro music]
[Emily]
Is my Internet slow?
[Shep]
No.
[Thomas]
Seems fine.
[Emily]
You don’t seem fine.
[Shep]
(Spooky ghost noises)
[Emily]
Both of you are very laggy.
[Shep]
I’m just laggy in real life.